Hi Esperanza,

So I went to my boyfriends house for Thanksgiving.  I met most of his family and they were all very nice.  But throughout the time I was there, my boyfriend kept getting texts.  he said it was his friends sending him funny videos about thanksgiving but i kept seeing Sams name coming up.  he doesn’t have a friend name sam.  i think it might be this girl samantha at school but idk.  should I ask him about it or not?

Claritza

Hey Claritza!

I’m happy you reached out to me for advice. Well first of all I am glad his family was nice and treated you well on Thanksgiving dinner. That is a good sign that his family is approving of you. Now, on getting notifications so often is a bit off but the first thing you should do is not assume that it is someone else.  Who knows it can be his friend sending videos but if you feel like the dots aren’t connecting and you don’t feel comfortable just leaving it like that I suggest you talk to him about it and maybe ask to see his phone in a respectful manner. I would say from experience, I would check the phone with his permission or talk to him about how it made you feel uncomfortable and weird. Mention how you still feel a bit insecure about all the notifications and ask him for complete honesty. Don’t put too much pressure but ask your partner to be honest with you and not lie. I hope my advice can help you in any way and just remember that there will always be misconnections in relationships but the best thing you can do is communicate and ask for honesty and trust!

Sincerely,

Esperanza