At some point in their life, students may experience struggling to fit into their friend group due to a difference in interests or in experiences, and resulting in the need to change oneself or start the process of finding a group all over again.

When feeling left out of a friend group, it can be for a variety of reasons but the top two are most likely caused by varying interests and boring activities. For example, a student at Hoover during their freshman year could be in a friend group with people they’ve known since elementary school. They could’ve had a decent friendship but over time, they each might have grown their individual opinions and have lived through different experiences at school or home. Thus becoming distant.

Being in high school with a broader range of students, it is possible one friend from the group will find another that they have a stronger connection with. When this happens, the one who gets left out might just ultimately feel the need to either attempt to include themselves with the only people they have ever known or start the process of a friend group again. Essentially some students at a younger age tend to make the choice of trying to include themselves into the group as seeing it as the easier path. While students in about High school tend to pick the choice of not seeing the situation as worth it at that point.

Some students here at Hoover High School have shown their perspective from their younger self, as well as their current view.  The past perspective includes; “ I used to change my outfits and my make up to how my friends would look.”  And the recent perspective includes a change in views with learning from the past and developed ideals;  “I try to remember that I don’t need anyone’s approval.”

Overall, it is best to remember there isn’t a need to change oneself for the want to fit in. To quote Brené Brown, “True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are; it requires you to be who you are.”